Their New Normal
by Klaineismycrack
Summary: Kurt and Blaine struggle to come to terms with their life since "The Accident" as it is now known. Blaine is a new quadriplegic and needs Kurt now more than ever. Kurt wonders if he is enough for him.
1. Prologue

Kurt was exhausted. There was no other way to say it. He needed help. Being the primary caregiver for a quadriplegic was a full-time job but Kurt also had an actual full-time job! Blaine had been home from the rehabilitation hospital for two weeks and Kurt felt like the worst fiancé in the world because he was coming apart at the seams already. The hospital had encouraged Kurt to let them have a home health company send nurses to take care of Blaine daily but Kurt had outright refused anything other than the Physical and Occupational therapists because they were helping him regain some use of his arms. He couldn't stand the idea of a stranger bathing Blaine. The thought of someone Blaine didn't know and trust helping him go to the toilet. No, absolutely not. Kurt wouldn't stand for it. He would take care of him until he was able to care more for himself. They only needed each other and everything would be fine.

Sitting on the couch two weeks later with tears running down his face though, he realized that he couldn't do it all by himself. With trembling hands, he dialed the number on the card for a private duty nursing company. He was told that this company was covered by their insurance and that Blaine was disabled enough to qualify for 24 hours per day of nursing. "Caring Hands Home Health this is Cathy speaking how may I help you today?" "Hi, my name is Kurt and I was told to call you regarding my fiancé. He has a spinal injury and recently came home from rehab. I…I need some help". "Kurt, we are here to help you both. Tell me who his ordering physician is and we will get the orders to see your fiancé today".

Kurt felt like a giant weight was lifted off his shoulders. He would have some help today. He wasn't going to have to do this alone anymore. "Thank you so much Cathy. You just made my day". He was starting to get a little choked up. "Do you have an email address that I can send the admission forms for you to fill out?" Kurt gave her the necessary information and hung up the phone feeling a little more hopeful than he did 10 minutes ago.

All of their family lived in Ohio while they lived in NYC. Their friends all had budding careers and were insanely busy. Kurt had no support system nearby. Sure, when the accident happened, everyone flocked to the hospital to sit vigil with him while they waited for Blaine to stabilize. One by one though, they went back to their lives until one day, Kurt made the trip to the hospital and no one was there to sit with him. It was just him and Blaine to figure out their new life together. One where Blaine can't walk, feed himself or even sit up unaided.


	2. Chapter 1

It was nearing 7pm and Kurt was getting angrier by the minute. Blaine was supposed to come home right after class ended at 5 and he hadn't managed to show up yet. They had plans with some friends for dinner and they were going to be late now.

'Hello, you've reached the voicemail of Blaine Anderson. I can't come to the phone right now but leave me a message and I'll return your call as soon as I can' "Blaine, this is getting ridiculous! Answer your damn phone and tell me where you are. We are going to be late for dinner with Alex and Jamie. Please just call me back." Kurt ended the call after leaving his third voicemail. His texts were showing as "delivered" on the screen but none of them were read. Where was Blaine and what was he doing that he can't read a text message?

Kurt phoned Alex and let him know to go ahead and go to dinner without them as Blaine hasn't shown up yet and he seems to be unreachable . "Do you think there is something wrong Kurt?" Alex asked fearfully. "I'm sure he's fine. He's probably just gotten distracted by something and forgot that we had plans tonight. You know how he is." Kurt said this to Alex but at the same time started to wonder if maybe something was wrong. "Ok Kurt, well let us know when you get ahold of him and maybe you can join us later on for drinks". Kurt finished the call and tried to call Blaine again.

The telephone rang as it had been but this time there was an answer on the third ring "Hello". Kurt was shocked to hear a woman's voice answer Blaine's phone. "Uh, hi. I'm trying to reach Blaine" "Yes, I'm Cindy and I'm a nurse at New York Presbyterian Hospital. I have his belongings that were taken off him when he came in and his phone was ringing. Do you know how we can reach his family?". " Wait….what? Blaine's in the hospital? He is on his way home from class. Are you sure it's Blaine?" Kurt was becoming frantic as this point. None of this made any sense to him. "Sir I'm sorry, I can't give out any information. I just need to reach his family". "I'm the only family he has in the city. I'm his fiancé Kurt. I'm on my way and I'll call his parents from the cab".

Kurt rushed out the door of their apartment in a haze. He wasn't even sure he could remember what hospital Cindy said they were at. He told the cab driver NY Presbyterian and hoped he was right. The cab ride took so much longer than any ride he could recall taking before. Every street they would turn down, they were in standstill traffic. Finally, the cab reached the ER at the hospital and Kurt jumped out after paying the driver. "Hi, I'm Kurt Hummel and I was told my fiancé is here". The receptionist behind the desk asked Kurt for the name and date of birth of his fiancé before locating him in the computer and directing him to wait in the lobby and a doctor would be out to speak with him soon. " No, you don't understand. I need to see him now." "Sir, please sit down and a doctor will come to get you. You can't enter the trauma bay". Kurt was stunned by the word "trauma" and sat down in the nearest seat.

Only 5 minutes later, a young man wearing blue scrubs and a white coat came to the waiting area and asked for "Mr Hummel". Kurt jumped up and followed the doctor to another waiting room. "I understand you are Blaine's fiancé and he has informed us that you are to be kept in the loop with what is happening." "That means he is awake right? He talked to you so he's ok". "Mr Anderson is far from ok Mr Hummel. Yes, he is communicating with us but he has extensive injuries. The most urgent one is a C-5 fracture in his neck. He also has a rather large wound on his left upper leg with a lot of blood loss." Kurt felt the room start spinning. Blaine broke his neck. That's all he was hearing as the doctor rattled off the list of injuries they were aware of so far. "What happened? No one has even told me what happened. He was in class and was supposed to be home a couple of hours ago" "I'm not sure exactly what happened. All I've been told is that he was struck by a car. NYPD has a deputy here following up on the case. I will have him come and speak with you. Have a seat Mr Hummel and please know that Blaine is in very good hands right now. We have one of the best Trauma Centers in the state and we are taking very good care of him."

Now that Kurt has an idea of what happened, it only made him worry more. Blaine was hit by a car and broke his neck. This is the sort of stuff your parents warn you about when you are little. 'Hold my hand when you cross the road so a car doesn't hit you and break your neck' This doesn't happen to a 22 year old Columbia Med School Student. Kurt was startled out of his thoughts by Officer Johnson. "Mr Hummel?" "Yes, that's me, are you able to tell me anything about Blaine Anderson?" "I was on the scene when the incident occurred. Blaine was crossing Broadway at 168th Street when a car ran the red light. I was in my cruiser in traffic and saw it happen. Blaine was struck in the right side of his body and thrown over the car. He was unconscious when I got to him but he came to quickly and doesn't appear to have a head injury. He was talking to me until the EMTs arrived on the scene and they took over at that point. I followed the ambulance here and I'm assigned to his case. I will be speaking with him a few more times to get more info and keeping him informed of the investigation process of the accident. They tell me he is just coming out of another scan now so I will take you back to see him in just a few minutes". "Thank you Officer." With that, Kurt sat with his head in his hands and his elbows on his knees. He pulled his phone out of his back pocket and called Alex. "Hey Kurt, we are still at the restaurant if you guys want to join us still". "Alex…..Blaine is hurt. It's bad."


	3. Chapter 2

Kurt was just ending his call with Alex who was already in a cab with his husband Jamie to come to the hospital. Kurt was very thankful that someone else would be there with him to take in all the info. He didn't trust that he could remember much right now. He knew he should go ahead and call Blaine's parents but he didn't have any solid info to give them yet so he decided to wait until he sees Blaine.

Another doctor stepped into the small waiting room and sat down across from him. "Mr. Hummel, I need to fill you in on a few things before I take you back to see Blaine." Kurt felt like his world was about to bottom out. "As my colleague told you earlier, Blaine has a cervical fracture of the C-5 vertebrae. A bone fragment lodged itself into his spinal cord and has caused some significant damage. We have him immobilized currently and are administering meds for the pain in his neck and head and also steroids to reduce swelling around the spine. He also broke his pelvis in the accident. We will address that once we can stabilize his neck. We will be taking him up for surgery within the hour so I'm going to let you see him and talk to him beforehand. He's becoming quite frustrated with the fact that you haven't been brought to see him yet." At this, Kurt imagined the wrath that Blaine must be throwing at the nurses and doctors. Blaine may be an "Alpha Gay" but he can compete with Kurt when it comes to diva-esque tantrums. "When you see him, I don't want you to be taken by surprise. He looks bad. He has a large neck brace on to keep everything immobile until surgery where we will fuse the vertebrae and put him into a halo brace. He is pretty much bruised all over from the impact and multiple hits along the top of the car and coming to a stop on the street. We have cleaned and closed the open wound on his femur and we determined that he has a mild concussion which is a miracle considering the force with which he hit the ground. The biggest challenge right now though is that he doesn't have any feeling below midway down his chest. We don't know if this will be permanent or temporary but as of right now, his spine is damaged and we are going to try to heal it. Let's hope for the best and prepare for the worst." Kurt nodded his understanding and tried to hold back his tears as he learns that the love of his life may never be able to move again.

"Do you have any questions?" The doctor gave Kurt a moment to gather himself. "No, I just want to see him if that's ok". "Of course it is. Follow me." Kurt was guided through a short hallway and through a set of double doors labeled "Trauma East". The doctor took him to a small cubicle-like room and let him enter first…There was Blaine. Blaine locked eyes with Kurt and as if nothing at all was wrong said "I'm sorry we missed dinner Honey". Kurt couldn't fight tears anymore. He was terrified of the state that Blaine was in but more than anything, he was so relieved to hear him say something so..so…Blain-ish. "Oh it's ok Sweety, it was Thai and you know I hate Thai anyway." He stepped over to the left side of the gurney that held Blaine. When he realized that he was unable to turn his head and talk to him, he remained standing and leaned into his line of vision. "Are you in any pain Baby?" "No, not right now. They're giving me something for it and it's awesome. Have you called my parents?" Kurt shook his head no "do you want me to?". "I think you should. I don't think this is going to be good." " Blaine, don't say that. The doctor said that they are going to try to fix the spine…" "Kurt, I'm not an idiot. I'm a med student. I know what a spinal cord injury means. At best I'm going to be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life."

How could Kurt argue with his logic? He was right. He knows very well the terms and lingo that are being thrown over him from doctors to nurses and technicians. He knows what he's facing with painful accuracy. Hope and good thoughts are lost on Blaine when it comes to people's health including his own. He knows facts and right now, the facts are pretty scary. "Well, I will call your parents while you're in surgery and have them come to the hospital. Alex and Jamie are on their way now." "Good, I'm glad you will have someone with you to keep you from driving yourself crazy." With this, Blaine gave him a small smile and two nurses stepped into the room and began prepping the gurney for traveling to the surgical floor. "I'll be there when you wake up Honey. I love you so much." "I love you too Kurt. I'll see you soon."

Kurt could only attempt to control the hitching in his chest and the tears started to fall once again down his face as he watched them roll Blaine down the hall and to the elevators. He was taken to another waiting room to make his calls and wait for Blaine to be brought out of surgery and taken to ICU.

The call to David and Marlena Anderson was painful. Blaine's Mother had to hand the phone to his Dad to take down the information as she was too emotional. Kurt hadn't even told them the worst of the situation. Only that he was hit by a car and in surgery right now. He said goodbye to them and hung up the phone. He then called his Dad and Carol. By the time he was done talking to his Father he was sobbing uncontrollably. He let his Dad know the worst-case scenario. He needed to share this burden of knowledge with someone. He told him not to come to NYC just yet though. He wanted to wait until the surgery is done and see how things are. His Dad said that he would make the calls to their friends and give them a heads up so that Kurt could focus on the tasks at hand there at the hospital.

Three hours later, he was taken to the ICU to sit with Blaine while he awoke from anesthesia. He was in no way prepared for the sight of Blaine this time. He had a giant metal contraption attached to his head with screws and it was anchored to a hard vest that went all the way around his torso from what he could tell. The head of the bed was slightly raised and his arms were both propped up on pillows at his sides. His gaze followed on down his body and he noticed that they had put white stockings on Blaine's legs and placed a pillow under his knees. There were at least 10 monitors attached to him and they all had a unique sound creating a sick sort of symphony in the small room. Kurt sat in the chair next to the bed and placed his hand over Blaine's right one. He rubbed his thumb softly over the scraped skin wondering if Blaine could even feel it. A nurse was standing behind him and he asked "Is there anywhere I can safely touch him that he can feel? I want him to know that I'm here and that he's safe." The nurse, Lacey according to her name badge, walked over to the bed and explained to Kurt that before the surgery, He was reporting sensation from just below his nipples and up. "He can probably feel your hand on his". This made him feel a lot better. At least there was one normal thing in all this. Blaine could be a giant ball of nerves and on the verge of a nervous breakdown before a big exam and all Kurt had to do was reach for and hold his hand. No words were needed. Just the close contact was enough to bring him back into himself and clear his mind.

The melody of the monitors and the nurses popping in and out every 5 minutes kept Kurt company for the next hour when he heard a grunt. He shot straight up from his chair and leaned over to speak into Blaine's ear. "Blaine, Baby, can you hear me? It's Kurt. I'm here Honey. I'm right here". Blaine's face crumpled and he gasped. Kurt went to the door and caught the attention of Lacey who rushed into the room. "Mr. Anderson, are you in any pain? Can you open your eyes for me?". "Kurt..I-Kurt." "I'm here Honey. Are you in pain?". Anyone looking at the man in the bed could tell that he was in pain by the look on his face and the sweat beading on his forehead. Lacey emptied a syringe into his IV and Blaine started to visibly relax. Kurt placed his hand on Blaine's collar bone and rubbed. Anything to let him know that he was going to be ok and not to be scared. It seemed to be working when hazel eyes opened and looked up into blue ones.


	4. Chapter 3

Once Blaine was fully awake, Kurt and the nurses were better able to calm him down. He was understandably terrified and in a good deal of pain. "Blaine, Honey, what can I do for you to make it better?" "I don't know. I don't like this. It hurts and I can't move." Kurt tried anything he could to help soothe his panic-ridden fiancé. He rubbed his shoulders, carded his fingers through his hair and sang to him. Nothing was helping. Just then a nurse came into the room with a syringe and explained it was Valium. The medication was administered and Blaine was much easier to entertain. Kurt actually smiled for the first time in a day when Blaine started singing nursery rhymes in a drug-induced haze.

The first few days lingered much like this. Blaine constantly drugged to the teeth and Kurt sitting with him and making sure he was well cared for. The nurses quickly fell in love with the couple and found Blaine too adorable for words. The Andersons were never far away. They stayed at Kurt and Blaine's apartment and took shifts sitting with Blaine so that Kurt could take breaks to sleep and eat.

It was at the one week mark after the accident that Blaine became unbearable to be around. He was over the whole thing. He was done and didn't hesitate to take it out on Kurt. One morning after a particularly difficult physical therapy session Blaine stopped talking to Kurt altogether. "Honey, please tell me what you're thinking. I can't help you if you don't talk to me". Blaine just stared at the ceiling with a steely glare. " I'm serious, I'm trying here and all you're doing is shutting me out". That was the last straw. "Oh really? All I'm doing Kurt? Right now all I can think is 'I wonder if I'll ever be able to hug you again or if I'll be ok with rolling down the aisle instead of walking down it with you' I'm sure it must be SO difficult for you but trust me, it's worse on my end." "Then tell me Blaine. Don't shut me out and don't yell at me!" "Kurt, please just leave. I can't handle this right now. I just want you to leave…please." The pleading in Blaine's voice almost cracked his resolve. "I'm not leaving. I'm here for the long haul and I'm not leaving. You can yell and curse and hate me all you want but the last thing you need is to be alone."

Three more weeks passed before Blaine was deemed stable enough to be moved to a rehab hospital. He was loaded into the back of an ambulance and driven to Mount Sinai Hospital. They have a top-rated Spinal Cord Injury program and they are told it will be another five to six months before he will be ready to go home.

Kurt had a lot of work to do in the next few months. Their current apartment was nowhere near wheelchair accessible. They lived in a 3rd floor walkup and it was just under 600 sq ft. Luckily, their insurance combined with the insurance of the driver who hit Blaine was taking care of relocating them to a suitable home where Blaine could live as independently as possible. Right now, money was thankfully not an issue. Kurt had meetings three times weekly with various insurance adjusters, case managers, social workers, contractors and mobility equipment specialists. It was Blaine's job to get as well as he possibly could and Kurt was determined to handle the rest.

Therapy was tough. Blaine worked so hard and Kurt could only imagine how it must feel for him to be completely unable to move his body while therapists would stretch his legs and arms to keep them limber. There wasn't much they could do really until the brace came off in 6 more weeks. Too much could set back his healing and he would be unable to gain much control over his arms and hands. He had feeling in his arms but had no real ability to use them yet besides small twitches and movements. Kurt would hold his hand but there was never a return squeeze. Just a limp hand in his to remind him of all that's happened recently.

It seemed like just yesterday they were chasing each other around Central Park on a sunny day and a rainy day where they "christened" every flat surface of their tiny apartment. Kurt wondered if any of that would ever be possible again. Will Blaine ever genuinely smile again? Will they be able to make love to one another on their wedding night? Would there even BE a wedding night? Kurt shook the negative thoughts out of his head and went back to the task at hand. Feeding dinner to Blaine while trying to keep him awake long enough to finish.

For Blaine, this was just all very tiring. Tiring and sad. It's one thing to need your boyfriend when you have the flu and he takes care of you for a couple of days by bringing you Gatorade and a trashcan to throw up in. It's another thing to need the love of your life to help you do everything. Literally, everything. The entire point to rehab is to help Blaine adjust to life once he goes home. It's not a nursing home and Kurt is involved heavily in his care. Kurt wakes him up in the morning by raising the head of his bed and helping him get ready for the day. He brushes his teeth, inspects the pin sites in his head where the brace is attached to his skull, he helps him get dressed and by far the most embarrassing of all tasks, helps him use the bathroom. Through it all, Kurt smiles at Blaine like he's still the best thing since sliced bread. 'How can he possibly still love me through all this' is a common thought in Blaine's head. After the morning rituals, it's time for therapy 6 days per week. Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Psychologists, Mobility technicians come for measurements for his new power wheelchair that will be custom-built in the coming weeks that will allow Blaine to be semi-independent again. As of now though, he is sat up, turned, fed, bathed, toileted, groomed and transferred to a wheelchair mostly by Kurt and sometimes a nurse or therapist if Kurt is unavailable. In the evening, it's dinner and a television show followed by a bed bath and bathroom routine then finally he is propped up on pillows behind his back, knees and under his arms to keep him comfortable enough to sleep. Kurt then settles into the sleeper sofa in the private room to sleep always with an ear open if Blaine needs him in the middle of the night. What Blaine hopes is that Kurt does this all because he loves him and would do whatever he needs of him out of that love. He hopes that one day they will still be able to have a wedding and show all of their friends and families that they will be just fine because love conquers all. Even broken vertebrae and damaged spinal cords.

His worst nightmare is that Kurt feels obligated to be here. He is terrified that one day, Kurt will just walk out the door and decide that Blaine isn't worth a life of being more of a caregiver and less of a partner. He has been trying to mentally prepare himself for the possibility that he may have to be moved back home to Ohio to live with his parents if Kurt bolts. His parents love him, that's not a problem at all. They would love to have him closer to them, especially now. He just knows that if he goes home to his parents, the chances of him ever being happy and independent ever again will be gone. His mother will baby him and insist that he live with them where he will be "safe and well taken care of". He wants to be able to finish school one day and have a career. He doesn't want to live with his parents and collect a disability or settlement check once a month. He wants to have a happy marriage and possibly have a family of his own one day. He's not ready to be the 'poor crippled guy that used to be something and was on his way to success'. He wants the success!

It's with this newfound inspiration that he wakes up the next morning with a new attitude. He needs to be the Blaine that Kurt fell in love with. Maybe he can't dance around and sing like he used to but he can make Kurt feel good about himself and he can use the puppy dog eyes to melt his heart. He can't lose Kurt….he just can't. Kurt is the only good thing he sees he has going for him right now. Ignoring him and snapping at him isn't going to help his chances of retaining the best relationship he can ever imagine having. He needs to sweep Kurt off his feet, figuratively. This is going to take some help from some nurses. He will wait until Kurt goes out for his meeting with the home modification expert this afternoon and go over his plan with Jean the Charge Nurse.


	5. Chapter 4

Blaine and Jean had become fairly close over the last few weeks. Jean was a kind, older nurse who had taken an instant liking to Blaine when he was transferred to her rehab unit. It wasn't often that they had such a young person on this floor. Most of the patients were older people who were recovering from knee and hip replacement surgeries and stroke victims who were re-learning how to do daily tasks again. Blaine was just a baby compared to the other occupants of the unit.

Jean watched daily as Kurt came and went and she was nearly brought to tears one night when she saw Kurt run from the room and hide in the lobby to cry. "Honey, what's wrong" she asked. "I can't fix him. I don't know what to do. He won't let me into his head" Kurt was full-on sobbing now. Jean reached and took Kurt's hand. "You're right. You can't fix him. No one can make him the way he was before physically. That part is gone forever. Not even Blaine can fix that no matter how hard he works. All you can do is support and love him every step of the way until he accepts his situation and figures out who he is now." Kurt sat down on the chair and put his head in his hands. "What if who he is is this new angry person?" "He isn't, Mr. Hummel, he's just scared and frustrated. He will feel a lot better once they take the brace off and can work more on his arms and shoulders. He will see that he will have a lot more movement and therefore independence. He won't be like this much longer. I promise". Kurt gave her a watery smile and wiped away the tears. He stood up, nodded, and walked back to Blaine's room with newfound clarity and determination.

That was over a week ago and Kurt has been much more calm lately. Blaine is still as mean as a hornet with him but Kurt just lets it roll off his back. He continued to care for his fiancé day in and day out while Blaine mainly stared at the ceiling or just over Kurt's shoulder to the wall.

She knows that Kurt is currently at his 1pm meeting with the real estate agent that is working to locate an apartment that can be modified for Blaine's needs. She walks into Blaine's room and greets him the way she does every day. "Good afternoon Blainey!" Blaine flicks his eyes toward her and smiles. "Hello Jean. Just the person I needed to talk to". Jean starts to check his blood pressure and temperature. He is still having a lot of trouble with regulating those which is normal with spinal cord injuries like his. "Oh? What can I do for you today?". "I want to impress Kurt. Somehow, woo him. I have a couple of ideas but I need your help.". "Well then" Jean smiles as she winks at him "Let's get started".

When Kurt came back at 6pm, he was loaded with brochures and pamphlets given to him by the real estate agent of potential apartments. He was hoping that Blaine would be willing to at least give an opinion on a few of them. "Hey there. How has your day been?" Kurt asked as he stood next to Blaine's bed in his line of vision. "It was, interesting actually." Kurt looked surprised. This was the first time Blaine had answered that question without a negative comment. "Well, interesting is better than terrible I guess." "Actually, Kurt, we are going on a date tonight." Kurt's jaw must've hit the floor given the look on Blaine's face right now. "Don't look so surprised. You are my fiancé after all. Come on; help me get into the wheelchair so we can get this show on the road. I want to look good". Kurt set down his messenger bag and pulled the Hoyer lift over to the bed. "Blaine, honey, you are aware that we can't actually _leave_ the hospital right? While I would love nothing more than to break you out of this place for a night, I don't think that we could slip out unnoticed". "I know that Kurt, we have reservations in the cafeteria at 7." "Well, let's get ready shall we?"

After dressing Blaine in his nicest pair of track pants and zip up hoodie (the only thing that will fit around the halo brace) and strapping him into his wheelchair, Kurt pushed Blaine to the elevators at the end of the hall. They rode down to the ground floor which housed the hospital cafeteria. Kurt gasped when they entered the dining area and there was a table set in the corner complete with candles and roses. "Did you do this? _How_ did you do this?" Blaine smiled earnestly "I had some help from Jean and a few of the other nurses. They came down here earlier and decorated the table and some other stuff." Kurt was certain that he had never loved Blaine more than he does right now.

The food was brought to the table by the cafeteria staff and Kurt started feeding Blaine and himself. The meal was the usual cafeteria fare of Salisbury steak and potatoes with carrots but right now, it was the most romantic meal the two had ever shared. When the meal was finished and the two had shared a hot fudge cake for dessert, they headed back to the room. Blaine's neck was starting to hurt a lot so Kurt helped him back into the bed to relieve the pressure.

"Kurt, honey, I need to talk to you". Kurt felt his blood run cold. He had been afraid of this happening. The day that Blaine decided that he wanted Kurt to leave so that he wouldn't feel burdened with caring for him. "Yes baby, I'm listening". Was all he could get out. "I'm so sorry for the way I've been acting lately. I shouldn't be taking out my anger and frustrations on you. You've been nothing but perfect and I don't want you to think that I don't notice all that you're doing for me. I notice it and I'm so grateful for you. I don't know how all of this is going to play out but I know as long as I'm with you, I'll be ok." Kurt couldn't believe what he was hearing. Not only does Blaine want to stay together but he's admitting that he needs him. The tears ran fiercely down his face as he put his head on Blaine's arm and held on for dear life. "Kurt….honey, I didn't mean to make you cry. Please say something." "I love you so much. I was so afraid that you would never come back to me. I was afraid that you were going to ignore me and avoid eye contact with me forever. I'm not going anywhere you know. Don't get any ideas that I'm leaving you because you are still the man I fell in love with. Your physical prowess was never what made me love you. It was your humor, your kindness and your love. This little date night proves to me that you are still the man I met on the staircase at Dalton. You went out of your way to do something to make me happy. That's so _you_."

Just like that, the tension left the room. Blaine was ready to fight for them and Kurt was his biggest cheerleader. They looked over the books of real estate that Kurt had been given that afternoon and Blaine started looking forward to the day he could go home and sleep in a bed with his fiancé again. He has no clue how it will all work but he's willing to give it a try now.


	6. Chapter 5

The next 6 weeks dragged by for Blaine at the rehab hospital. Every day he wanted to give up and every day he forced himself to find reasons to smile and be thankful he was still alive. The therapists worked his muscles and joints to keep them from stiffening and did strengthening exercises on his arms to help him regain some control over them. Finally, after 12 weeks in the halo brace, he was about to have it removed.

"So, you're not going to put him under anesthesia to unscrew that thing from his head?!" Kurt couldn't be in the room for this if the answer to his question was yes. The nurse just laughed at him and assured him that it will be ok. "Blaine, honey, I will hold your hand but I can't watch this. I love you but there are limits to what my stomach can handle." The orthopedic surgeon entered the room and they began working to dismantle the contraption that Blaine had come to hate over the last 3 months.

In a matter of about 15 minutes, Blaine once again looked mostly normal. He was bleeding slightly from the screw holes in his forehead but other than that, he looked great. A rigid cervical collar was put on for support and small band aids placed over the open spots to stop the bleeding. Once everything was done, Blaine was laid back down on the bed and he and Kurt were left alone again.

"I can't believe how much better you look" Kurt marveled as he curled up beside his fiancé. "I feel like I can breathe better without that vest on too. I didn't realize how heavy it was until now". Just to demonstrate, Blaine inhaled deeply and Kurt reached over to kiss his cheek. "Good, I'm glad that thing is off. Now they can really start the physical therapy on your arms and hands. I guess the hard part starts now huh?". "Oh God don't remind me. Therapy is already tough enough. Now they're going to expect me to actually improve." Blaine smiled though. He was excited to see how much he could actually accomplish. He knew that he still had random spots of sensation below his chest and he could feel his arms completely. They were just unwilling to work with his brain's requests to move.

A nurse re-entered the room and helped Blaine take some much needed pain meds. After all, he had just had 4 screws removed from his skull and his upper body was suddenly mostly free to movement for the first time in 12 weeks. This all added up to a killer headache and neck and shoulder pain. Kurt laid with him until the meds lulled him into a peaceful sleep then went outside to make some phone calls. He called Blaine's parents to let them know that the halo is now off and that he tolerated it very well. He assured them that once he wakes up, he will set up a Skype call between them so they can see him. He then called his Dad and Carol and let them know the good news as well. Many texts with a pic of Blaine in just his cervical collar went out to their friends. Blaine had long ago gotten over letting people see him since the accident. He was embarrassed to be seen at first but their friends were all so supportive and encouraging he realized that they loved him no matter what he looks like. Modesty and pride were both things that he had to let go of to a degree. It's hard to be modest when you are learning a bowel program on a bedpan with your fiancé at your bedside. Being fed, dressed, bathed and turned all added up to some embarrassing moments but he was dealing with it pretty well at this point.

Most of the rest of the day was spent sleeping due to the pain meds being given every 6 hours. Kurt took the opportunity to finalize some plans with the builders who were working on their new apartment at this very moment. The driver's insurance had made good so far and had found a 2 bedroom apartment in midtown for them. It was a lot roomier than the one they currently rented and it was in a newer building with an elevator and security. Being a more modern building means that the doorways and halls are wide enough to accommodate a standard wheelchair. Blaine's wheelchair is much larger though so some adjustments needed to be made. The tub was replaced with a roll-in shower and all the knobs in the apartment are being switched out for levers for starters. Lots of small things that will make all the difference to Blaine.

Two days later, the guys were just finishing lunch when the door to the room opened fully and a gigantic power wheelchair was rolled in. "Delivery for Blaine Anderson" said one of the men with a clipboard. Kurt signed for the delivery and couldn't help how wide his eyes were at the monstrosity in front of him. "Don't worry sweety, you can bedazzle it" joked Blaine trying to erase the look of fear on Kurt's face. "Blaine, this thing has to weigh half a ton!" As if on cue, Blaine's physical therapist Jacob walked in "Actually Kurt, it weighs 350 lbs with the batteries in so not even quite a quarter ton. Blaine, I hope you enjoyed your rest these last couple of days because from now until you go home, I'm going to be your worst enemy." Blaine groaned "As if you weren't already?" "That's the spirit Anderson!" Jacob laughed and started positioning the sling for the lift under Blaine's body while he explained a little about the new wheelchair. "This thing is awesome Blaine. It's the mac daddy of power chairs." He slowly raised Blaine and slid the lift over to the wheelchair. "I'm getting in it now?" Blaine asked suddenly. "Well yeah, it's not here for decoration. You're gonna start learning how to drive this bad boy!"

Blaine had to admit, it felt good to be in the chair. The ones he had been using so far were pretty standard issue. They had high backs and a pillow always had to be propped behind his head. They reclined to keep him from falling out of them which caused him to basically only be able to see the ceiling and upper walls as they explored the hospital. This one was built specifically for him. Every possible measurement that could be taken had been taken and out of it all they created this chair. It was black with larger wheels in the middle and smaller ones in the front and back. The seatback was high but there was a headrest at the top. Once he was placed squarely in the seat, a thick black strap was secured with velcro across his chest and another across his lap. He was now able to sit up without falling. There were wide armrests that were shaped so that his arms could rest securely and wouldn't fall into his lap. "Ok Anderson, let's take her out for a spin." As he said this, he swung a little contraption around from behind the headrest that looked like a bendable straw attached to a box. "This is how you move it for now. It's only a temporary sip and puff system until we get your arms and hands moving better then you will use the hand control on the right armrest. For now though, you get this. I'm going to do the driving until we get to the gym so just relax and enjoy the ride." Kurt followed behind as Jacob moved them slowly out of the room and down the hall. The nurses and aides all smiled and cheered him on as Blaine rode past them. He was unable to hide the blush that crept across his cheeks and the wide grin he was sporting.

Once in the gym, Jacob stopped the chair and stood in front of Blaine. "Ok now, to move forward, you need to give a good solid puff into the straw. The wheelchair will start moving and to stop it just give a short sip. Now try it out." Jacob maneuvered the straw to Blaine's mouth and Blaine puffed into it. The chair moved and Blaine just about lost his mind. He just made himself move for the first time in over 3 months. He almost lost track in his joy and came close to forgetting how to stop. He sipped on the straw and came to a halt in front of Jacob. "Kurt! Kurt did you see that? " Kurt walked around to face Blaine and hugged him firmly. "Oh my God that was amazing!" Blaine continued in his excitement. Jacob went on to explain how to go backward, turn and even recline the seat to take pressure off of his neck and prevent sores from forming due to sitting in one position for too long. After an hour of practice, Blaine was making his way down the hall to his room. Kurt still helped him maneuver through the doorway using the hand control but Blaine was the most happy he had been in a long time. He was mobile while he was in the chair. He almost didn't want to get back into bed. If it weren't for the pain building in his neck, he would have kept making laps around the hospital. Kurt used the lift to put Blaine back into bed and made him comfortable. A dose of pain medication was taken and soon he was napping and dreaming about his new set of wheels.


	7. Chapter 6

Jacob the physical therapist made good on his promise to be Blaine's worst enemy. He had become relentless in the last month in his pursuit to get Blaine moving around again. Currently, he is teaching Kurt how to transfer Blaine from his wheelchair onto a big padded table for therapy. Kurt has gained a lot of muscle since Blaine got hurt but he sees now that he's going to need all of it. Blaine is a tiny guy but he's deadweight and unable to assist in the process. "Alright Kurt, you come around here in front of him and get your arms up under his." Jacob demonstrated by hoisting Blaine 3 inches above his seat and putting him back down again. Kurt made a valid attempt but only succeeded in getting an "oomph" out of his fiancé when he dropped him back down a little fast. "Oh Honey I'm sorry. I'll get this right I promise" Kurt apologized. "I know you will. It's just a little painful in the meantime". Jacob took the initiative and decided to call it an early wrap on their session. "Why don't you guys go and relax a little. We will pick back up tomorrow where we left off." With that, Kurt readjusted the straps on the chair across Blaine and they headed back to the room to watch some TV.

A week ago, Blaine was able to start using the hand control on the wheelchair and the straw thing was gone. His hands are still paralyzed but he now has a lot more control over his arms. He can lift his arms off of the rests and put them in his lap and back again. He can cross his arms over his chest and he can reach forward, although not very high, in front of him. He gets a little too excited these days when he reaches out and hits the elevator buttons with the knuckles of his right hand. His thumbs are pretty good but the rest of his hands are spastic and he has to wear splints on them to keep them from curling up. With the splints on, he can use his hands to open doors with a lever-type door knob. He can push things away from himself when he needs to. He is even learning how to feed himself using a Velcro strap on the side of his splint to hold the utensils. Most importantly though to him, he can touch Kurt again when he wants. When Kurt is moving him from the chair into bed using the lift, he keeps a hand on his chest to keep him from swinging. Blaine can now put his hand over it and it's become his new favorite thing.

"Your parents' flight gets in tomorrow at 3. I told your Mom I would meet them at the airport and take them to our apartment to drop off their bags. Are you excited they're coming?" Blaine's parents tried to make a trip to NYC every few weeks to visit but they hadn't made it there since the halo brace had been removed a month ago. He wasn't even wearing the cervical collar anymore now. He was able to move his head and neck almost normally if it weren't for the nagging pain lingering at the site of his injury. "I'm excited but I just wish I had more to show off. I was hoping to be better than this by the time they came back." "Are you kidding me right now? Blaine, the last time they saw you there was a giant metal cage around your upper body and you had no movement at all. You used your wheelchair to get to the gym, go through therapy, choose the button for the floor on the elevator and open the door to the room in the last two hours. How is that not better than you were?" "I don't know, I just thought I'd be further than this. I thought I'd be able to do more for myself. I know my Mom is going to give me that look she always gives me when she comes. The 'my poor little boy' look. You know the one I'm talking about." Kurt sighed and reached forward to hug him. "Your mom doesn't pity you. She just can't stand seeing you struggle so much. She's going to be shocked when you greet her at the front door of the hospital. Just make sure you have your phone on you so I can send you the signal when we get close." Blaine smiled a smile so big it lit up the room. He had almost forgotten about their plan to surprise his parents at the doors. "Make sure you have your phone on camera ready to get the look on their faces when they see me. It's going to be good."

They settled in for the afternoon and after Blaine's meds, he dosed off for a nap. Kurt opened his laptop to get a little work done while he could. He had been working again part-time for the last couple of weeks. His boss was very understanding and luckily his job these days didn't call for him to come into the office so he could work from the hospital as easily as anywhere. He had just been promoted to junior editor of the fashion department of a trendy local magazine when Blaine got hurt. Of course, his job was the last of his worries at that time but his boss was a wonderful woman and a good friend to him. She made sure he knew that his job was secure and to take as much time off as he needed. She even helped him file the FMLA paperwork with the company and offered up a company lawyer to represent Blaine in the case against the driver of the car. Blaine's spot at medical school would be lost however. He wasn't going to be ready to go back anytime soon, if ever, and they couldn't feasibly hold an open spot at one of the country's most prestigious schools indefinitely. Blaine understood this and honestly was ok with it. His ambition was to be a surgeon and you can't exactly perform surgery without the use of your hands. For now, the goal was just to take things day by day and work as hard as he could to be better.

The next day could not come fast enough for Blaine. He woke up earlier than usual and Kurt started getting him ready for the day. He dressed him in a pair of jeans and a dark blue polo shirt with a pair of sneakers. He put his hand splints on him and got him into his wheelchair. Once he was settled and strapped in, he headed off to see the occupational therapist one floor up. Kurt worked while he was gone and didn't look up until Blaine returned two hours later. "Sweety, you look frazzled." "I am. That woman is the devil I tell you. Today, she would not let me leave until I was able to pick a nickel up off the table. I never thought that one day the hardest thing I would do in a day's time was pick up a nickel up. It's hard to do when you can only move your thumbs!" …."Were you able to pick up the nickel?" Blaine smiled. "Three times".


	8. Author's note

Just wanted everyone to know that I haven't abandoned this story. Real life has gotten hectic but I've been writing. I'm in love with the directions I see this story going. Look out for some new chapters this week!


	9. Chapter 7

Kurt was nervous as he waited for the Andersons in baggage claim. They loved Kurt, of course they did. They considered him to be a member of their family and accepted his and Blaine's relationship just as they did every girl that Cooper deemed "The One". Kurt was nervous because Kurt isn't sure that he's going to be enough for Blaine one day soon. He's afraid that Blaine is going to be sent home from the rehab hospital and Kurt's not going to be able to take care of him the way that he needs. He has a sneaking suspicion that Mr and Mrs Anderson know this as well.

"Kurt Darling, it's so good to see you again!" Marlena strode up to Kurt and hugged him. David wasn't just behind her and clasped him on the shoulder.

"How are you holding up son?"

"I'm doing okay David" Kurt answered "I've got the easy job. All I have to do is be a cheerleader. Blaine's the one doing all the hard stuff".

They gathered the baggage and Kurt hailed a cab. Once at the apartment, they dropped off their stuff and freshened up a little before heading to the hospital to visit with Blaine. Kurt send a quick text to Blaine's cell phone to let him know they were on their way and that he had about 20 minutes to get downstairs if he wanted to pull off this surprise.

"So, how is Blaine _really_ doing Kurt?" David asked in a very direct way.

"He's honestly dealing with everything the best anyone could. He's had his spells. He went through the anger, the crying but he's really doing very well right now. I think the fact that they keep him so busy in therapy helps. He doesn't have time to feel sorry for himself. By the time he's ready for bed, he's falling asleep before I can get him out of the wheelchair. Nighttime was the hardest for him at first because his mind would just go all night. It was the only thing he could control so he just thought all the time. Now, they work him pretty hard and it's paying off". Kurt said with a grin.

"I can't wait to see him. It will be nice to be able to give him a hug without that awful brace around his chest and head. I'm sure he looks a lot better without it." Marlena had stars in her eyes as she was practically bouncing in her seat in the cab in excitement.

It wasn't long before they were pulling up to the hospital. Kurt sent one more text to Blaine that they were there and he hoped that Blaine was ready. They entered the main entrance and turned left toward the elevators when Kurt caught sight of Blaine. He was heading right toward them smiling ear to ear. It took a minute for the Andersons to catch on that this wasn't some other patient, this was their son!

"Oh my God Son, Oh my God." Sputtered David while Marlena ran to him sobbing and hugged him.

"Baby, you look fantastic. I can't believe it. You're driving a wheelchair yourself and everything! David look! He's using his hands to drive this thing!" She just kept going on and on and smothered her boy in kisses.

"Yeah Mom, I've been working since you saw me last. I can do a lot of things I couldn't do then. How about we head upstairs and I'll introduce you to some people.?" Blaine hit the button for the elevator to prove his point and ushered them in.

The elevator stopped at the floor that has become home to Blaine now. He introduced them to his therapists and nurses. These people felt more like his friends now. He spent so much time and had so many experiences with them that he was sure these people would be his friends for the rest of his life. He was excited to connect them with his family.

After introductions and promises to come to some therapy sessions with Blaine while they are in town, they head for Blaine's room. It had been lovingly decorated little by little by Kurt. Marlena cried when she realized that the quilt her Mother made for Blaine when he was a toddler was on the end of the bed. She thought that had disappeared years ago. It made sense to her though. It was made to be a comfort to him then and it is giving comfort now.

"It's just about dinner time. We should head for the cafeteria" declared Kurt. They all headed back down to the ground floor for some dinner and were further amazed by Blaine's ability to feed himself with only minimal help from Kurt.

"Blaine, son, I am more proud of you in this moment than I have ever been. You are working so hard to do things that you could do without thinking about them a few months ago. I can't even express to you how happy I am to see you smiling again and looking to the future. I just hope you know how impressed I am with you." David said with unshed tears in his eyes. Marlena could only nod in agreement due to emotions taking over her ability to speak.

"Thanks Dad. That means a lot to me. At one point I thought that graduating from med school would make you the proudest of me but I guess things have a funny way of happening."

They all agreed and finished their meal with smiles on their faces. Blaine was improving, Kurt was by his side and the Anderson's couldn't be prouder.


	10. Chapter 8

Along came September and Blaine was being discharged home from Rehab. He had continued to improve his ability to use his arms and hands over the months and his therapy team deemed him safe to be turned over to Kurt in their own home.

The new apartment is beautiful. Everything was now finished and their belongings had all been moved from the old apartment weeks ago in anticipation for Blaine's arrival. The doorways had all been widened. The bathtub in the master bath had been removed and a roll-in shower had replaced it. The carpet had all been removed and now wood floors will allow for easy maneuvering in a wheelchair. The kitchen counters were lowered enough that Blaine could reach them from his seated position amongst many other modifications including a front door lock that worked from an app on Blaine's iphone mounted on his armrest.

The day of his discharge was full of tearful hugs and goodbyes from the nurses, therapists, nutritionists and other people who had become so fond of both Blaine and Kurt. They promised to come back and visit often and were ushered to the front entrance to load into the van waiting for them.

In another few months, they will be the proud new owners of a modified van with a lift but until then, the insurance company has set up an agreement with a local transport company to take them where they need to go. The luggage and a few boxes of Blaine's things are loaded into the back of the van while Blaine and his wheelchair are secured just behind the passenger seat. Kurt climbs in next to him and they are on their way home. Jacob had volunteered to meet them at the apartment to help Kurt acquaint himself with their home equipment this evening. He had become very good at using the hospital's lifts, shower chairs and bed but the ones at home aren't exactly like those and he may run across a problem while Blaine is in the lift or naked and in the shower. Jacob will be there to make sure evening one goes smoothly.

Once they arrive at their building, the driver begins unloading the back. Kurt helps him get everything upstairs before coming back down to get Blaine. "Are you ready for this ?" Kurt asks with a smile on his face.

"As ready as I'll ever be I guess", replies Blaine. He wheels himself into the front door of the building and the doorman greets him with an outstretched hand . "Hello Mr. Anderson, I've heard so much about you. My name is Henry and I'm here Weekdays until 5. Let me know if you need anything at all." Blaine lifted his right arm and returned the best version of a handshake he can muster at this point.

"This place is great Kurt" Blaine states as he looks around the lobby.

"Yeah, it's even better once you get to the apartment. They've really done a lot of work on this place to get it ready. There is so much more square footage than the old place and we have a lot more storage." Kurt is quite proud of the place after all, he had a lot of input into it. They ride the elevator up to the 7th floor and stop in front of apartment 715. "Welcome home Honey" Kurt says as he opens the door and allows Blaine to roll in.

A good hour is spent just moving about the apartment checking out all of the fancy new fixtures and gadgets that are meant to help Blaine be as independent as possible. He's able to open doors with the levers installed instead of knobs. He can put his hand on top of the lever and just push down to operate one. No hand strength needed. The sinks are all automatic on and off with a sensor. Everything is modified but still very stylish. Blaine thinks to himself that he can really see himself living here and thriving. With all the excitement and activity, he starts to nod off while Kurt is unpacking his things.

"Sweety, do you want to lie down until Jacob gets here?". Blaine just nods his agreement and moves his chair to the side of the bed. Kurt unstraps him and makes sure the brakes are set on the chair. He forgoes the lift in favor of just wrapping his arms around Blaine and working him to the end of his seat. Once he can get a good hold around him, he lifts and pivots to sit Blaine on the bed. Through all this, Blaine is still fighting off sleep. Kurt removes his shoes and glasses and props him up a little on pillows. Before he can get the covers over him, he's snoring softly.

Kurt can hardly believe that after six months, Blaine is here. He's in their bed and no nurses are going to come in during the night to check vital signs. Kurt will go and make dinner for them while Blaine naps. No more eating in the hospital cafeteria or having food brought to the room. It's up to Kurt now. Blaine's safety and health are his responsibility. It scares the life out of him but he feels ready. He can do this. He doesn't need a staff of medical personnel to take care of his fiancé. He can work from home and be there for him when he needs him. He smiles as he kisses Blaine's temple and goes to the kitchen to prepare dinner. Jacob is eating with them tonight and he wants everything to be perfect.

At 6:30 pm, the doorbell rings. Kurt is finishing the table setting and answers the door. "Jacob, Hi. You're just in time. Blaine should be waking up from his nap soon".

"Did the trip wear him out?" Jacob laughs and puts his bag down next to the door. "He will probably tire out pretty easily for a long time. Everything is going to be slightly different and he's gonna need a lot of naps".

"He was practically falling asleep while I transferred him from the chair into bed. I just hope he can stay awake long enough to eat." Kurt continues talking to Jacob as he puts the finishing touches on dinner and motions for Jacob to follow him to the bedroom.

They spend the rest of the evening going through the nightly routine that Kurt has practiced in his head a million times. Brush teeth, wash face, bowel routine, put in bed, transfer to bed bag and check catheter site, undress, check for pressure sores and skin breakdown, get into pajamas and put night splints on hands. Jacob assures Kurt that he's doing fine and he was able to use the lift flawlessly. Once he leaves, Kurt is able to get himself ready for bed. He finally climbs into bed next to Blaine and realizes that he has to wake back up in 5 hours to start the day again.


End file.
